Cure for your case of the Mondays

This site is brilliant and beyond time.  I have a few pictures that I should submit…do you?  Actually, this site is about to inspire some knock-offs.  Especially the cross-bow picture.

Your Body is a Wonderland «.

So insipiring for the Farmers Market

I have a feeling this ’song’ is going to be stuck in my head for the next 10 years…but the good news is I know the words.  And it will get that Katie Couric Auto-Tune OUT of my head.  Yay PERFECT weather on a SATURDAY!  Click through to the Geekologie site for the collegehumor.com version.  Not to sound like a total dweeb…but how much further do I have to sink?  right?  I mean, I’ve got to be close…posting this on a Saturday with perfect weather?  Le sigh.  Anyhoo-the video on Geekologie is better…better sound, better visuals…more BUNNIES!  Yeah…I’m pretty much Lennie from Of Mice and Men when it comes to bunnies.  I need adult supervision…

(via Geekologie…my new favorite site)

Sure, Why Not: The NOM NOM NOM Song – Geekologie.

Too Brilliant Not to Post

This seemed like an appropriate post for a Friday since this scene is likely to play out in many a city across this great country this weekend.  Let’s be honest, Spring is the air, it’s going to be in the 60’s tomorrow and there’s really no reason not to get your drink on in a MAJOR…and…if you play your cards right, that should lead to you getting your swerve on.  I was guilty of some drunken texting myself last weekend.  It was almost completely uninteligible…I like to pretend that makes me mysterious but, having reviewed the text in question, sober eyes have shown me that there was no mystery involved.  I might as well have been slurring galic on the phone because that’s what it looked like typed out.  I’ve had years of practice so I’m usually pretty good at it…but for some reason…as of late…the iPhone and I have not been working together to communicate with third parties effectively.

For those of you not familiar with the Foggy Monocle, it’s brilliant.

The Foggy Monocle » Blog Archive » A Gentleman and a Gentlelady Make Explosive Romance.

Follow-up: Pictures from the Potomac Explosion

Here’s what the much anticipated fireball looked like:

Kinda lame…and not that atypical for DC.  Frankly, I’m happy they can stage these little explosions on the Potomac without setting the whole river on fire-ten years ago, before the clean up and the return of bald eagles, a river of fire would have been the likely result of even a baby fireball like this one.

Wonkette : Terrifying Teevee Fireball Confuses City.

File this under “Things that would make me poop my pants if I didn’t know they weren’t real”

I cannot believe they are doing this!  And at 9:30am on a weekday!  I used to take Key Bridge to work everyday…around 9:30am…a huge fireball on the river would totally freak me out.  I mean, this is DC we’re talking about.  District of “this is not a drill” fucking Columbia.  Seriously, we don’t practice fire drills or getting bombed…because we actually think those things are happening too frequently.  My mom worked for the govt her entire career.  I can’t even count how many bomb threats her building got…and she worked for the USDA!  On the one hand, you’re probably wondering why bomb them?  On the other hand, the people that do are generally farmers and, as X Files taught me, those farmers have every ingredient needed to make some kick-ass bombs!

So, if you happen to be near Gtown or in NoVa and you see a HUGE fireball on Wednesday, it’s probably not real.  If you see it on Tuesday or Thursday, it is real and you know the drill.

Front Row Washington » Blog Archive » If it’s Wednesday, the fireball isn’t real | Blogs |.

And the Captain Obvious Award goes to…The NY Times for this Headline!

White House Optimism Not Shared by Republicans – NYTimes.com.

Wow…Really?  You’re kidding?  Republicans don’t SHARE the White House’s Optimism?  That’s SHOCKING.  That’s never happened before.  I don’t know what the next year holds or what the next decade holds.  But I do know that it took lot’s of different people around the globe in many different fields to dig the economic hole we’re currently in.and it’s going to take a united effort involving everyone-from main street to wall street and around the globe to fix this.  Republicans can say whatever they want about plans…until they have something better, we’re sticking with what we’ve got.  Also, who got us into this mess?  8 years of a Republican White House…specifically George W. Bush.  Has anyone else noticed that Bush’s name is RARELY used now?  It’s almost as if they are trying to make American’s forget who was at the helm when the warning flares were signally…as if they want American’s to forget how many lives have been lost and how much money has been spent on wars in Afghanistan and Iraq…wars that we’re no closer to winning now than we were when we invaded.  Bankruptcy?  Oh yeah…Obama is the reason the country might be bankrupt in a few years…it has NOTHING to do with the tax cuts or stimulus checks or the FDIC not making banks pay their annual dues or unchecked spending by the former administration.

American Heros: This Unemployed Gal

Cathy was just your regular gambling gal.  She lost her job and went on a four day gambling streak…and WON!  She’s officially my new hero.  What have I been THINKING?  Sitting here, applying for jobs???  CLEARLY I should have hopped the free bus down to Atlantic City with all the vagrants and cashed in on the free time the gambling gods have given me and taken some of that FREE MONEY!!!  I could have been Cathy!  Collecting prize after prize!  $50,000 is a lot of money!  Unfortunately, in this day and age…with the market bouncing up and down…it can be easy come easy go…but if you’re a gambler, like Miss Cathy, that money could make a fortune in a few days in the market!  The right stock tip and she’s set for…well at least a year or so if she stays away from the slots.  Also, she’s been living with her kids so hopefully this will help her move out, get back on her feet, and start gambling again!

Cathy’s situation and two commercials this week have brought something to my attention.  Apparently more parents are moving in with their kids for purely financial reasons-because of foreclosure or layoffs or what have you.  I guess I never really considered that as a possibility with my parents…until someone made off with their retirement nest egg all Madoff style…but now I’m wondering how many people are actually dealing with this.  I’m also imagining my parents showing up with their bags and bunking on the fold out sofa…that would be the awesome icing on the kick-ass cake…

Woman’s Winning Streak.

File this under “R U Shittin’ Me?”: Banks Didn’t Pay Into FDIC Coffers From 1996 To 2006

 

 

 

Who knew politicians were such optimists?  Apparently most banks didn’t have to pay into the FDIC from 1996 to 2006 because officials at the time thought “the good times would last and that bank failures would not be a problem”…

I really don’t understand the logic behind this…it’s like banks charging poor people to keep their money in the bank and giving rich people money back!  The banks were FLUSH-go and get what they OWE.  It’s not like the IRS says to me “You know what…actually…we’re doing pretty good this year…I don’t think we’re going to need your money.  This year is on us.”  And you know why that is?  Because the IRS knows better!  They knew that THIS year would come…that the good times would NOT keep going for me and that I would need unemployment!  So why are they surprised that banks suddenly need money?  The banks are just like me!  I am the bank!  The bank is me!  And neither one of us saved up for this day because we had you FDIC!  And stupid Congress.  Not to sound like a crazy c-o-n-spiracy person, but this HAS to be the result of some SERIOUS lobbying.  Not charging fees to banks is not an idea Congress or the FDIC came up with on their own…Any of Abramoff’s dirty little prints on this?  The timeline fits but I’d hope they’ve turned over every rock by now.  Who knows?  They might have been too busy telling banks to forget about the fees!

Fdic: Banks Didn’t Pay Into FDIC Coffers From 1996 To 2006.

Oh Nos! There are under 1,000 billionaires now!

 

 

 

That MUST be one of the seven seals, right?  Maybe the one about martyrdom? or famine?  (Or bowls being full or not full?  I wish I could post that Enigma song right now…)  

Moving on.  Billionaires went big and LOST big-especially Uncle Warren who’s always held a soft spot in my heart for donating most of his wealth…actually…so I guess that means the real losers here are the foundations he’s supposed to be leaving all this wealth to.  Le sigh.  On the one hand, it’s a crap ton of money these high rollers lost.  On the other hand, it seems like most of them are still sitting on pretty big piles o’cash so it’s hard to really feel for the bastards.  Also, can someone PLEASE explain where all the money went?  Is it ALL in China and Brazil?  Is THAT what happened?  I mean, someone has to be getting rich in all this…  It sure as shit ain’t me.  

BBC NEWS | Business | Rich list hit by economic crisis.

New Guilty Pleasure

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s funny because it’s true…especially 28 and 21.  I freaking love sleeping late.  I love knowing that I am getting a few more hours in while the rest of the city is cramming onto a packed subway car and trying to chug down some caffeine.   It’s my guilty pleasure and so is this site.  I also laught a little everytime my former boss’s stocks slip…which has been pretty much everyday so far.  Le sigh.  It’s the simple things…when you’re life has been simplified due to circumstances beyond your control.  

 

Stuff Unemployed People Like.